Healing

Only a Flashlight

How do you see reality?

By Anita Moorjani

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Although I try to share my near-death experience, there are no words that can come close to describing its depth and the amount of knowledge that came flooding through. So the best way to express it is through the use of metaphors and analogies. Hopefully, they capture a part of the essence of what I’m trying to convey at least in some small way.

Imagine, if you will, a huge, dark warehouse. You live there with only one flashlight to see by. Everything you know about what’s contained within this enormous space is what you’ve seen by the beam of one small flashlight. Whenever you want to look for something, you may or may not find it, but that doesn’t mean the thing doesn’t exist. It’s there, but you just haven’t shone your light on it. And even when you do, the object you see may be difficult to make out. You may get a fairly clear idea of it, but often you’re left wondering. You can only see what your light is focused on, and only identify that which you already know.

That is what physical life is like. We’re only aware of what we focus our senses on at any given time, and we can only understand what is already familiar.

Next, imagine that one day, someone flicks on a switch. There for the first time, in a sudden burst of brilliance and sound and color, you can see the entire warehouse, and it’s nothing like anything you’d ever imagined. Lights are blinking, flashing, glowing, and shooting sparks of red, yellow, blue, and green. You see colors you don’t recognize, ones you’ve never seen before. Music floods the room with fantastic, kaleidoscopic, surround-sound melodies you’ve never heard before.

Neon signs pulse and boogie in rainbow strobes of cherry, lemon, vermillion, grape, lavender, and gold. Electric toys run on tracks up, down, and around shelves stacked with indescribable colored boxes, packages, papers, pencils, paints, inks, cans of food, packages of multihued candies, bottles of effervescent sodas, chocolates of every possible variety, champagne, and wines from every corner of the world. Skyrockets suddenly explode in starbursts, setting off sparkling flowers, cascades of cold fire, whistling embers, and animations of light.

The vastness, complexity, depth, and breadth of everything going on around you is almost overwhelming. You can’t see all the way to the end of the space, and you know there’s more to it than what you can take in from this torrent that’s tantalizing your senses and emotions. But you do get a strong feeling that you’re actually part of something alive, infinite, and altogether fantastic, that you are part of a large and unfolding tapestry that goes beyond sight and sound.

You understand that what you used to think was your reality was, in fact, hardly a speck within the vast wonder that surrounds you. You can see how all the various parts are interrelated, how they all play off each other, how everything fits. You notice just how many different things there are in the warehouse that you’d never seen, never even dreamed of existing in such splendor and glory of color, sound, and texture—but here they are, along with everything you already knew. And even the objects you were aware of have an entirely new context so that they, too, seem completely new and strangely superreal.

Even when the switch goes back off, nothing can take away your understanding and clarity, the wonder and beauty, or the fabulous aliveness of the experience. Nothing can ever cancel your knowledge of all that exists in the warehouse. You’re now far more aware of what’s there, how to access it, and what’s possible than you ever were with your little flashlight. And you’re left with a sense of awe over everything you experienced in those blindingly lucid moments. Life has taken on a different meaning, and your new experiences moving forward are created from this awareness.

Confessions of a Perfectionist

By Ashley Ryan
I spent the majority of my life pretending to be someone I wasn’t.

Putting on a happy face and looking good in order to disguise what was going on inside.

I thought with nice clothes or a brighter smile, people wouldn’t notice my inherent flaws or the mistakes I made.

This mask of perfection lasted many years and now that I’m a mother, I especially notice all the ways I try and keep up appearances…

Setting a good example for my child.
Keeping it all together for my significant other.
Giving, giving, giving so others will see me in a good light.
The list goes on.

At work, I get emails from wonderful, incredible, women and mothers who feel isolated, anxious and depressed.

They feel under-appreciated and live with an invisible wall of pressure to be the perfect woman, mother and wife.

They experience negative emotions that stem from the strong ideals of how they should be.

Living with these feelings for many years; keeping it all together for way too long, and comparing myself to what I thought others wanted, my perfection came at a cost. It cost me my parenting and my marriage. This was a hard lesson to learn, and my struggle with perfection taught me that…

Perfection is an illusion.

It’s the golden handcuffs that keep us locked in an invisible cell.

The expectations, ideals and fantasies that we hold of ourselves, constantly comparing our bodies, hearts and minds to others, striving to fit in, looking for others to say we’re OK so we can feel OK.

Perfection doesn’t exist, it’s created in our minds.

Perfection comes at a cost.

Trying to be someone were not is exhausting. When we put energy into being what we’re not, we often lose precious people and moments along the way. Moments we can never get back — and sometimes relationships that can’t be mended.

When we try to hold it all together we give our power away.

By pretending that we can do it all; by trying to be everything for everyone, we give our power away. When we give our power away we lose ourselves and the nature of who we are and what we stand for.

Some valuable lessons I learned through trying to be perfect…

Tell the truth.

When we tell the truth about something we set ourselves free from the burden of the un-truth. Being honest is enough to release ourselves from the bondage of perfection.

Be vulnerable.

If we’re vulnerable and show our true feelings and needs we set the tone for others to do the same. It’s amazing what opens up when we share ourselves with others.

Share with others.

By sharing with others, we open up the space for them to share with us. The more we share ourselves with friends and strangers, the more we see how alike we all are. Sharing creates a space of love and closeness and is a breeding ground for new relationships and opportunities.

Mistakes are opportunities.

I used to hide my mistakes and avoid them at all costs, but perfection taught me to embrace the opportunity in my mistakes and not to give up at the smallest sign of challenge.

I spent many years living in the shadow of the perfect woman; now have the freedom to live my life as I truly am, not as others want me to be.

Is it time for a “Spiritual” Spring Cleaning?

By Celebrity Makeup Artist, Life Coach, and Bestselling Author Michelle Phillips

Nature has a beautiful way of cleansing to purge what is no longer serving it and make way for renewal. Old leaves fall off and gentle winds carry them away to help the trees gather water and brace for the cold. With the spring thaw comes a flurry of new foliage to cover the bare branches and the growth starts anew.

In many ways, we as people have adopted a similar schedule for our own cleansing and renewal that follows nature’s calendar. We use this time each year to go through drawers and closets to clean out the clutter, dust the nooks and crannies, and give things the “out with the old, in with the new” spirit.

On a similar note, I have seen through my career as a makeup artist that much of the beauty on our skin comes from treating it with the same reverence; cleansing and gentling exfoliating off the old, dry layers and allowing the new, glowing skin to surface.

It makes me wonder though, if taking such care of our external selves is so beneficial to creating beauty in our lives, why should we stop there? Let’s keep going with a spiritual and emotional tidying up that truly sets the stage for a period of growth in our lives. Much like pulling out the couch to find life-sized dust bunnies, we might be surprised what we find by searching deep areas of our lives that may not get the attention they should.

Here are some places to look to start scrubbing away the negative in your world:

List your positives. Sometimes when there is clutter on our furniture we only see the mess. The same goes for when we focus on the negative aspects of our lives. Our failures, etc. By listing your positive influences, accomplishments, and qualities, you polish the plusses to shine beyond the clutter.

Nourish your spirit. Too many of us have influences in our lives in the form of books, TV, and movies that become the prism that we see the world through. And unfortunately today, so many of these media sources are dark and negative. Take the time to find and enjoy positive influences on a regular basis to bring a more peaceful outlook.

Plant the seeds for growth. Have you always wanted to take an art class, dance lessons, or try meditation? Rather than continuing to stagnate or grow in directions not of your own design, list the top ten things that you love to do and then start doing them. Make no excuses. When we begin to incorporate the things we love to do and experiment with new things on an on-going basis our lives become full of joy, happiness, and beauty.

While the first part of my career may have focused on outer beauty, there was a point where a shift was created. An awakening to the connection between the beauty of our inner spirits and what we radiate out to the world became clear.

By taking the time to nurture your spirit and cleanse yourself of negative influences, you clean space for more beauty to come into your world! Happy cleaning!

6 months to live – try 4 years and counting!

One of the greatest inspirations you could ever have to be a better person and give back is my friend Lori Zudell. She has been one of the guiding lights in my life and I hope her story will be for you as well. Upon coming up with the idea for the show, “Courage and Grace”, I could think of no one better to highlight than her!

Diagnosed with colon cancer and given 6 months to live, today she not only is she alive… she THRIVES!. And that was 4 years ago. Since the taping of this interview she has gone on to do amazing things in the area of Healing Arts. Check out her website http://www.helpingyouthrive.com . This is one of my stories from the Courage & Grace Series. If you have a story of Courage & Grace to share. Please make a post or contact me.