February 28th Radio Show-Raising Beautiful Children

On today’s show we are talking about raising beautiful children.

If you have been a frequent listener to the show you know when I say beauty I’m not talking about making sure your kids are in the latest fashions or have perfect haircuts….I’m talking about raising them to be positive people with a strong and balanced sense of self-esteem.  The kind of people that will help us create and foster true beauty in our world.

As a mom, a step-mom, and at one time was a single mom and  know that while we may need work to put a roof over our heads or provide food, our most important job in life is parenting our kids.

Join me and my guests, Dr. Wendy Walsh, Jan Horn, and Sandi Schartz.  Together we will share some valuable tools parents can use to help balance and reduce stress in their own lives and in turn empower their children to create their own beautiful lives.

Tune in live by logging onto www.hayhouseradio.com on Monday February 28th at 9am Pacific Time/12noon Eastern Standard Time.  If you missed the show, you can listen to the show in the archive section.

Some info on my guests:

Dr. Wendy Walsh is a journalist, a psychologist, and a mother.  You may have seen her on TV as she is a contributor to CNN, The CBS Early Show, The Today Show, Lifetime, and many more. www.drwendywalsh.com

Jan Horn is the Executive Director/Founder of Blooming Place for Kids.  Jan and her staff are deeply committed to improving the lives of neglected and abused children by giving them hope for their own future through programs developed to build leadership skills, self-confidence, good moral character and values.

Blooming Place for Kids’ residential camp promotes positive values and encourages teamwork, sharing and individual growth.

A PLACE TO DREAM . . . to GROW . . . . . and just be a KID!!!  www.bloomingplaceforkids.org

Sandi Schwartz is an educator, author, radio show host, and inspirational speaker with over 40 years of experience in the field of child development, Sandi combines the best of traditional wisdom with a depth of spiritual awareness, delivering a powerful message for parents. Her most distinguished honor was from the Governor of New York State for leadership and courage in her work with children and families in the aftermath of 9/11.

Sandi’s Leading Edge programs for parents and educators have received international acclaim.  She consults with parents in many countries and her weekly radio show, Leading Edge Parenting, is heard around the world.

For More Information About Leading Edge Parenting or to contact Sandi for consulting, speaking, or to receive her free daily love nuggets, go to www.sanditeaches.com

February 7th 9a.m PT/ 12pm EST- Turning Heads by Turning Hearts

Have you forgotten what you have to offer? You are a divine gift to the world. By being true to your sense of purpose and embracing the authentic nature of you, you give yourself permission to live a life where it is okay to bloom, soak in the sun, and be the wild color you were created to be. This is in turn empowers those around you to follow your lead. The results of overcoming obstacles through determination and belief in yourself can create a ripple effect for generations to come. Join Michelle to learn how you can look and feel more beautiful by being true to your purpose.

Listen live or from the archives online by logging on to www.hayhouseradio.com.

Hay House Radio – Jan. 24, 2011 show

This Monday we’ll discuss the meaning of true beauty. I’ll be speaking with guests Carnie Wilson and Asia Voight.

Join us at 12 PM EST/9 AM PST for The Beauty Blueprint on Hay House Radio.

Click here to listen live – http://www.hayhouseradio.com

Carnie Wilson is the daughter of Beach Boys co-founder and mastermind Brian Wilson and a member of the Grammy Award-nominated group Wilson Phillips. She has been very public about her battle with Obesity. Carnie, in her own words, is simply “a go-getter.” “I like to work,” she explains. “I don’t like to stop moving — like a shark! But at the same time, I never do something unless my heart’s in it. I can’t be fake. I really go by instinct, and it seems like everything I do has to have some kind of message behind it.”

Carnie  is raising awareness for Autism.  She has seen first hand the challenges that children with Autism and their families go through.  To help Carnie in her mission  log onto http://www.theangelsmall.com/cwilson/

Find her online at www.carniewilson.com.

Asia Voight is an internationally known Animal Communicator, teacher and speaker, who has worked with over 40,000 animals in the last 13 years. Asia’s work has been featured on ABC, NBC, and Fox TV. She has graced the covers, of many publications such as Brava and Women Magazine, the front pages of the Wisconsin State Journal and the Fitchburg Star with her amazing personal story and words of animal wisdom. Asia has published a chapter in Crossing the Rubicon: Celebrating the Human-Animal Bond in Life and Death, an inspirational and uplifting story of the healing aspects of her Animal Communication work. Find her online at www.AsiaVoight.comClick here to read her guest contribution to this week’s blog.

Fire Red to Carnation Pink: Uncovering Inner Beauty

By Asia Voight

“Some day my daughter is going to be Miss America!” my dad boasted to other parents waiting outside dance class. Standing beside him my leotard glimmered in bronze over my long smooth legs. Every daughter wants to make her father proud. Believing that outer beauty reigned supreme, and that one day I would be Miss America, I signed up for every lesson that would get me on that national stage. Gymnastics, modeling, piano, cheerleading, singing and baton twirling lessons filled weekly schedules. Determined to please my family and make myself a star I pressed hard to excel.

By my teenage years, the momentary highs of my many accomplishments were followed by a deep sense of shallowness and darkness that lingered inside me. And at night I became haunted by a re-occurring dream where layers of bizarrely expressive African looking masks came off my face only to reveal nothing but a void, a black space. I began to see myself as empty and hollow, a mannequin of changing masks. The positive outward appearance and talents of my waking self was intended to bring me love and acceptance but instead, it brought about a severe disconnection between my outward persona and what I felt. Until one day, I found myself on my knees in prayer.

“God, show me how to be real. I’m sick and tired of feeling like a hollow shell.” Like a small tornado my prayer swirled up to Heaven.

In my early twenties, a speeding semi driver crashed his rig into my van and into my dreams of beauty. Trapped inside the van, a raging fire closed in on me. Managing to wriggle my body through the partially open driver’s side window, I jumped into an inferno of flames and miraculously made it to the other side

As days and weeks passed, lying immobile in my hospital bed with 72% of my body charred, I watched lovely new skin begin to form over raw flesh.  Maybe I still can be Miss America, I thought. However, all hopes cast off with this new skin as it became twisted like roots and vines. The skin fit so poorly over my bones and muscle constricting my every movement. I could not even wipe my own tears away. Hope ebbed away as each new scar formed. All the softness and gracefulness of my skin and body had been burnt off and taken with it the only avenue to love and acceptance I had known in the world.

“It’s time to look,” a staff nurse said. She handed the mirror to me but I would not take it from her.

“No!”

“Your going home soon, you have to look, “ She jetted the mirror in my face.

“I want to remember myself as beautiful,” I kept my eyes closed.

“You have to face the truth,”

“I’ll do it on my own.”

Later that day, shuffling weakly with the use of my cane and a grip on the wall handrails I made it to the bathroom. Once in I closed the door behind me. Elated to have accomplished my longest walk since the accident I relished a moment alone. This euphoria didn’t last long. Seeing the large wall mirror caused me to break out into a cold sweat. Can I do this?

Cautiously peeking out one eye at the top of my head in the mirror I let out a sigh, Not so bad, I Initially thought. Scanning down the rest of my face I grasped the sink’s edge as both eyes fixed upon my neck covered in a speckled, discolored skin-graft that looked like dead bare chicken skin. Steadying myself against the vanity, hot tears streamed down my cheeks like water down a tumbled mine shaft.

Any illusion of beauty gone, I set into hating the hospital staff, and made God an enemy of mine. Doctors call this healing? God betrayed me by keeping me alive for this. Death would have been the miracle here. I am utterly worthless now. Hideous.

My anguish only deepened as the staff got me ready for the day before leaving intensive care. My nurse gave me a package – a Jobst pressure garment used to compress raised scars. Painfully, the tight nylon-like suit stretched over my thin-skinned legs, torso, and arms – at the bottom of the package, a facemask. Refusing to put it on the staff held vigil at my bedside. My shouts of “No!” and “Get that away from me,” would not deter them. Finally giving in, the mask came over my face like a suffocating white sheet placed over the dead. The binding magnified my shallow breathing as the Velcro at the back of my head became fully attached. The nurses walked away pleased at saving my face from contracting, while I disappeared under the restricting tan mesh and ceased to exist.

The next day they wheeled me from the hospital to a vehicle waiting to take me to the airport and eventually my hometown. A staff nurse handed me a laminated card. If anyone around me were to become overly frightened I could show it so they knew I was not a bank robber or dangerous somehow.

Sitting in a narrow wheelchair on the airport runway, the crew and my mother cautiously lifted me up the airplane stairs. Rounding the corner into the aisle, the piercing stares of alarmed travelers bore into my eyes. Tightening my throat to stifle tears, I put my head down until landing. Upon arrival at O’Hare Airport with one more flight home, my mom wheeled me through the crowds to our next gate. A stranger faced us; I shielded my heart ready to be confronted by her glare. Instead she pulled a flower from her purse and looked deeply into my eyes. My breath sucked back into my chest as our gazes locked. Mouth agape, I reached out for the flower. I felt her heart open like the pink carnation she handed me. Smiling through my Jobst mask my heart lifted.

During the next few months of recovery it continued to be painful turning over in bed and reviving my paralyzed leg, but the image and sensation of the unknown airport traveler continued to give me strength to progress with my physical therapists. Likewise, meeting new people in the hospital became easier as my skin and body continued to heal. Now it was time to take my new face out into the world.

I no longer wore the mask and yet I continued to be self-conscious about the red scar that covered the left side of my face, and the graft on my neck that looked like a patchwork quilt. I drove into my old neighborhood and pulled up to a favorite hangout. My heart raced in my chest as I thought, What if no one likes me anymore? Or worse, they don’t want anything to do with me since I’m not pretty. I sat there for long moments of breathing and searching for my confidence to take this step out into the unfriendly world.

Then the image of the pink carnation sprang from my mind, energizing me like new blood. And I heard an angel speak to me through the darkness like one of the caring night nurses; “Inner beauty and love shines out as attractiveness, be this splendor and wear it on your face.”

Every cell of my body savored this declaration and I found the courage to walk into my old haunt. And to my amazement, familiar friends from my past gathered around with hugs and kind words! Looking deeply into their eyes I witnessed authentic beauty reflected back to me as if each of them had handed me a pink carnation.

About Asia Voight

Asia is an internationally known Animal Communicator, teacher and speaker, who has worked with over 40,000 animals in the last 13 years. Asia’s inspiring work has been featured on ABC, NBC, and Fox TV, as well as, countless radio interviews like the Rick Lamb Show and dressage rider Jane Savoie’s tele-seminar. She has graced the covers, of many publications such as Brava and Women Magazine, the front pages of the Wisconsin State Journal and the Fitchburg Star with her amazing personal story and words of animal wisdom. Asia has published a chapter in Crossing the Rubicon: Celebrating the Human-Animal Bond in Life and Death, an inspirational and uplifting story of the healing aspects of her Animal Communication work.

Speaking in front of thousands of animal lovers, Asia is often a popular keynote speaker for countless events like the Midwest Horse Fair® in Madison, Wis., where she has delighted audiences with her on-the-spot personal readings, humor and warmth.

Also, a popular teacher in her Animal Communication workshops, Asia generously shares her skills by gently guiding course participants on how to connect with one’s own animal companions, through exercises and guided meditations.

Beauty Meditations

Women longing for inner and outer beauty are invited on a personal devotional journey with author and speaker Ginger Garrett who offers expertise, encouragement, and biblical guidance. Readers will gather life-changing insights alongside practical ways to nurture their spiritual, emotional, and physical health.

Meaningful meditations and compelling prayers that speak directly to what women are experiencing will gently guide readers to discover how:

  • beauty and radiance begin in the soul
  • joy, laughter, and friendships restore a youthful glow
  • simple steps lead them to reflect the beauty God sees in them
  • inner and outer transformation happens when shame and secrets are released
  • kindness to themselves and others starts the journey to loveliness

Readers will enjoy and benefit from Ginger’s vulnerability and expertise as they explore the unique relationship between worshiping our Creator and caring for ourselves.  To order a copy click here

Getting back on track

Every January we start off with the best of intentions.  We make goals for better health, financial security or any number of things but by this point in the New Year a lot of people have fallen off of the resolution wagon.  So do you just give up and try again next year? I say NO and here are some ways to keep you going…

First off, how do we get off track?

Anytime you set out on a new course there is always a chance that things may not work out the way you planned.  Unfortunately, when we get fixated on how we think success should look and how fast it should come, we tend to give up at the first speed bump.  Then we feel as if we have failed and it’s a vicious cycle of beating ourselves up…and feeling worse off than we did before we set the goal…

How do we stick with our new goals?

Plan on falling off track! It’s normal.  The trick is to say, no worries, I am going to start over     with more determination this time

Set goals that are more realistic this time around.  I think we set huge goals for ourselves and when we don’t see results right away, we get frustrated and quit.  Set the big goals but with milestone goals along the way to continually feel a sense of accomplishment while keeping your eye on the prize.

When you write down your goals, does fear come up for you?  Write down the fear. Then once you look at that fear, write down what doesn’t scare you about it.  (Like when you lose 20lbs you will feel better, have more energy, not to mention a huge sense of accomplishment).

The important thing is to not be unnecessarily hard on yourself.  You’re human, with the best of intentions, but lending your voice to the chorus of negative voices in your head will definitely not help encourage you towards your goals.  This year, take small steps to create your most beautiful life!  If you need some support, call me on the radio and we will work through it together.

February 14 – The Most Beautiful Date You’ll Ever Have

The day of love is upon us and it’s time for the most beautiful date you’ll ever have…YOU! Love is the light that reveals your beauty to the world!

My guests will be Leah Carey and Michael Chase.

Leah is the creator and facilitator of the Live. Write. Share. workshops that help people to share their stories as a vehicle for healing old wounds and finding their own inner resilience.

Leah writes a daily Miracle Journal where she recounts the miracles she finds in her life each day. I’ve re-posted her entry “The Miracle of a YUMMY Body” – about loving her own body with all its feminine curves – on my blog; also click here to read a perfect Valentine’s Day treat, “The Miracle of Amazing Men: In celebration of the male spirit“.

Leah’s blog is at www.themiraclejournal.com. Find information about her book, “Transforming Your Body Image” and her workshops at www.leahcarey.com.

Michael is affectionately known as “The Kindness Guy” and he is one of today’s most powerful voices for creating a kinder world. At the age of thirty-seven, Michael ended an award-winning photography career to begin The Kindness Center. His book “Am I Being Kind?” is set to be released by Hay House Publishing on April 15 and is now available for pre-sale at Amazon.com.

From his “24 Hours of Kindness” events to his “Caffeinated Kindness” days, Michael brings the message of kindness to cities and towns around the country. He is dedicated to doing small acts of kindness for others and has made it his life’s mission to spread kindness across the globe. His passionate keynote presentations have inspired thousands by revealing the secrets to true happiness and how we can all create a better world. Valentine’s Day is one of Michael’s favorite days of the year because it’s a day when we focus on the best in each other.

Find Michael online at www.thekindnesscenter.com.

What do you love about yourself and why?

This article was sent to me by Angela Jones, a plus size model whose passion is to help women break free of trying to be “perfect” and embrace their own true beauty.  I loved this article so much, I asked if I could post it on my blog to share with all of you~

In  Love and Beauty~

Michelle Phillips

Natural Beauties…by Andrea Dodd

That was the premise of our evening. Angela and I – giddy to induce an awakening, or enlightening at best; planned the second event of it’s kind, for Plus Size Models Unite. Our lovely guests offered their vulnerable hearts in the truths they imparted on the topic… what they love about themselves. What they would tell their 13-year-old selves. How do you define beauty?

Looking around the table, I was amazed at the purge of innocence. We all seemed to struggle with the first question… but allowing time to let it resonate offered real definition. If only this event was nationally recognized… what a beauty movement it could be.

As our evening progressed, our purpose broke the surface. Walls fell. Honesty rose from depths… some harder and darker than others. But, the climate was safe, radiating with an energy of feminine confidence. An understanding. We are all susceptible to the societal and cultural biases of the way a woman’s body “should” look. Some able to see through the noise. Some, if affected at just the precisely impressionable moment; are left forever fighting for clarity. So many factors shape a woman’s paradigm of beauty. Consequently, a softening of current “beauty” standards must occur. What we love about ourselves has to become the topic–not what we despise. Let the change we fight for be noble, not superficial.

Our daughters are watching.

I propose acceptance and truth. It’s there that we will find peace with our perfect imperfections and embrace our natural beauty.

Andrea Dodd

What do you love about yourself and why?

My face tells you exactly what I’m thinking~ my eyes really are the window to my soul. My smile is my truth. I love the physical strength of my body, and my endurance of my soul to obtain peace and live there ~ gratefully basking in my blessings.

How do you define beauty?

Confidence. Grace. Healthy mind and body. A strong laugh. Good posture. Defining best attributes in style and make-up. Never excusing flaws.

What would you tell yourself at the age of 13?

Be a little more daring. Don’t worry so much about your frizzy curly hair and crooked teeth. You are strong and loving. Your body is exactly as it should be and you’re loved because you’re YOU. And, one day you’ll have a fame-worthy smile, so say’s your best friend you just met, 12 years later.

Heidi Brager

What do you love about yourself and why?

I like my eyes. They link me to my family. I can express my moods with my eyes and how I make them up. They can be innocent or they can be smokey and sultry. They can be tired and sad or delighted. The eyes are the windows to the soul.

How do you define beauty?

Beauty is how you feel. How you carry yourself. I love seeing women discover their own beauty when they see themselves in a new way or through a new perspective.

What would you tell yourself at the age of 13?

Stop trying to be something you’re not. Own who you’re feeling you are. One day you’ll be happy that you are you. And, don’t get in that tanning bed!

Jill Kramer

What do you love about yourself and why?

I love that I know I’m a good person. I’m real, honest, and I laugh a lot and I pay attention to the little things. I listen when people talk, and I believe that day+day+day=your life. The little things matter. I want to make sure the people in my life know how amazing they are and how happy & lucky & blessed I feel to have them in my life. I want to make them feel unique and special.

How do you define beauty?

Real, true, honest beauty shines from within. Real beauty is honest and real. Good, sincere, genuine people are stunning. With a sense of humor, and passion are beautiful. Be passionate about what you believe in and who you are. Beauty follows.

What would you tell yourself at the age of 13?

Don’t take yourself too seriously. Have goals, be curious-but enjoy and savor each and every day along the way. Take time to find beauty, happiness, laughter & joy in the smallest, most simple things. Worry is the misuse of imagination. Laugh. Be trustworthy. Have integrity and be true to yourself. Seek wisdom in the ages but look at the world through the eyes of a child…see its beauty.

Kelsey Schalock

What do you love about yourself and why?

I love my freckles!! I think what makes me unique and special is my ability to make people laugh. I try to find the best in any situation.

How do you define beauty?

Beauty is something that can only be found in the eye of the beholder, but to me, a beautiful person is someone who is down to earth, full of life, caring, and courageous.

What would you tell yourself at the age of 13?

I would tell myself the sky is the limit.

Cortney Covert

What do you love about yourself and why?

I like that I’m compassionate, sensitive and I like that when I put my mind to something…I can do anything. I’m a good mom and very loyal.

How do you define beauty?

Being confident, and secure in who you are and just truly be a good person.

What would you tell yourself at the age of 13?

Don’t sweat the small stuff and embrace your body. Don’t worry what other people think and be confident in who you are as a person. Always love yourself.

Nicole Firestone

What do you love about yourself and why?

I love that, as I get older, wrinklier, and flabbier, I become more content with who I am. I trust my instincts more. I like my eyes. I think their honest and patient. Special ~ I have an insatiable desire to understand the human soul.

How do you define beauty?

Confidence. The willingness to take chances knowing you’ll look like a fool. Admitting your mistakes ad imperfections. Humility mixed with reason.

What would you tell yourself at the age of 13?

No matter where you go–you’re always there! Sooner or later, you have to really dig deep and face yourself. Also, be kind to yourself. You are your own worst enemy and the best friend you’ll ever have.

Trust yourself.

Sarah Howell

What do you love about yourself and why?

I love my eyes and arms. Why? My eyes were something I grew up hating and my arms…I grew to love my arms. They are like my grandma’s big and buff and it reminds me how hard of workers we are. My eyes are from my mom. When I see them, I think of her. I’m a survivor. I’ve been strong my whole life.

How do you define beauty?

Your soul! What is in your heart. Everyone is beautiful in a different way. Whether it is your eyes, lips, butt, etc. everyone has something that makes them unique and beautiful…everyone.

What would you tell yourself at the age of 13?

Stop worrying about what other people think you look like. Love what you have been given. We are all beautiful!

How not to see RED on Black Friday

One of the busiest and most exciting shopping days of the year is just around the corner. Along with that day comes the rallying cry of, “Charge it!” and a whole lot of stress. Some of it is self-imposed and some of it is the retail industry knowing just how to get us amped up. The ads for Black Friday are starting earlier and seem to get more exciting every year. The sales even start earlier too! Midnight? You’ve barely cleaned the kitchen or come out of your turkey coma with enough clarity to drive the car and you’re expected to have your shopping head on?! And how many “sales of the century” can there be? Sure we just changed over to a new one but at least give us a couple years to forget about the last one and for gosh sakes pace yourself.

Whatever it is that makes our individual eyes light up, they always seem to find something to start us down the path of mass retail hypnosis. Like zombies we march to the malls with glazed eyes and the mantra of “must shop” only to snap from bliss to stress the moment we pull into the parking lot. From fighting for a parking spot, to getting in to a tug-of-war over the last sale item on the shelf, to finding the perfect gifts for everyone on our lists, we seem to find ways to make our blood boil.

A lot of the stress we feel is self-imposed and can be avoided. The keys to surviving possibly the best shopping day of the year are preparedness and perspective blended with a few of my favorite things~

  1. You can start mapping out what you want to accomplish by making a gift list and charting the sales you want to hit well in advance. This is not the best time to be swimming through manic crowds of pre-dawn discount shoppers looking for gift ideas. Plus, it’s not only a great way to get more done in a short period of time but can also help with budgeting. If you know what you want and get what’s on your list it could cut down on impulse buying. While we all want to take extra special care in getting the right presents, but excessive spending around the holidays is another place we put pressure on ourselves.
  2. You can even use that gift list to route your buying journey to have a nice flow so you’re not bouncing from store to store feeling confused and anxious.
  3. Get a ride to the stores or take a taxi to cut down the stress of finding a place to park. You can also use the fact that you have a designated driver as an opportunity to have a little a pre-party. Speaking of parties, get a shopping buddy.
  4. Remember, if we don’t get everything done we still have over 3 weeks to work on it. If we do cross most everyone off our list we can rest easy and stay out of the frenzy that is sure to build throughout December. We can go back to stressing over what to wear to the company party.

If all else fails and you want to cash in all the great deals and have the fun of shopping without ever leaving the house. Have your shopping buddies over to buy online. You can party hearty and when you shop til you drop you can drop on your own comfy couch.

Thanksgiving Dinner – The Sitcom Sit-down

The holidays are almost here and in theory they should be a time of great joy as we spend precious moments with the people we cherish. Unfortunately for a lot of us that time falls squarely between a sitcom and full-blown horror flick. If they were still making Peanuts cartoons but with a more modern feel, for many of us it would probably be something like, “It’s a dysfunctional family dinner Charlie Brown.”

Whether you are hosting the family dinner or just attending somewhere else, for some reason what should be a safe haven of love and support gets turned into a place you have to emotionally toughen up before walking in the door. If it’s not the delicious aromas of turkey and pie that makes you take a deep breath before ringing the doorbell, what is it?

For starters, you have relatives or friends that can’t be invited at the same time as others, you’ve got an uncle who it’s in everybody’s best interest if you water down his drinks, and there’s always at least one person you know is going to pick apart your life like a buzzard working on a piece of emotional roadkill. The latter can be particularly disturbing when most of us are not facing the easiest of times. All of this leaves Thanksgiving with the potential for the turkey to be stuffed with massive drama!

Before you give it all up and resign yourself to the kiddy table, let’s look at some ways to make the most of these times with family and friends.

First, let’s remember that it is just that, time with the people that mean the most to us. These are people that we know will be there for us through thick and thin. As for Uncle Larry, continue to sneak in the watered down drinks, and if family members are feuding, remember-it’s not your problem. Like I tell my kids, don’t get involved in the drama, and move away from any negative situation.

As for our own worry about being shamed for some of our unfortunate situations, let’s start by not making this a day of playing make believe. It’s time for a little honesty. I’m not saying decorate your house with your dirty laundry but if you’re going through hard times of any sort be honest about them. We stress ourselves out so much with the energy it takes to be “perfect” for the people who should understand us most. To get through any crisis in life we need support. As much as family can tend to judge us and be critical they are there for us. Which brings me to my next suggestion…
Don’t’ be afraid of your family, they really do want to see you succeed. If you are really anxious about the inquiries that will be made by some people who are really labeled as “judgmental” in your tribe, pick up the phone before the big day arrives and let them know what you are going through. While you’re at it, tell them that you are hoping to gain their support and understanding. Many times the people closest to us think they are taking care of us by “fixing” our problems. Let them know if you are just looking to vent, a shoulder to lean on, or maybe not fixing but some positive ideas to guide you through the situation. Hopefully this will lead them to support you in a positive direction and help them keep their negative comments to themselves.

If we can set boundaries and remember what and who are really important in our lives we can get beyond the drama to the love and laughter that should fill our lives more than that extra scoop of mashed potatoes ever could. That said, remember to take time to go around the table to give everyone a chance to talk about what they are truly thankful for.