Tag: Michelle Phillips

Be More by Doing Less: Removing the Distraction of Busyness

By Ashley Ryan
busyness“It’s not enough to be busy. So are the ants. The question is: What are we busy about?” — Henry David Thoreau

Growing up I didn’t think much of myself. I grew up poor, and spent much of my childhood alone. My father wasn’t around and my mother worked full-time, so I had to look out for myself from a very young age. This created emotional baggage, which I carried for many years.

Even though things started rocky, I was committed to myself and consciousness at an early age. I always felt like I knew there was something greater out there, but I wasn’t sure what.

Over the years I went to therapy, did courses and programs, and practiced being a better person. But the niggling issues from my childhood stayed with me like a shadow.

One way I coped with my baggage was by being very “busy.” Doing a million things. Distracting myself with a to-do list or activities that gave me a temporary boost, a few moments of joy, only to dissipate at night when I slowed down, lying in my bed wondering “Is this all there is?”

I was a master of disguise, and a master of distraction. And even though I was on a journey of self-awareness I often felt like a little girl again, alone and scared.

My real journey of healing began when a good friend suggested that I slow down. He pointed out that I was using distractions to run away from the loneliness that I was experiencing.

This resonated with me, and I decided to take on his advice.

I stopped activities, stopped traveling, stopped moving, stopped the texts and phone calls (I actually got rid of my phone), and committed to being with myself.

I didn’t know what this was going to take, or even look like, but I knew something had to change.

My real awakening began when I removed all distractions and sat with myself a little bit each day.

During this time of discovery I lived in India, which showed me that in our culture we rush and do all day long, we don’t often take a breather, or a rest.

And I think we do this — I think I did this — because I was running from myself. There were things I didn’t want to look at, issues that kept coming up over and over again, uncomfortable things that were safer to ignore.

Taking time to know myself was the most powerful process I’ve experienced, and being alone was the most authentic thing I’ve done.

My true inner journey began with the un-doing.

What I’m writing to you isn’t complex, it isn’t a whole bunch of stuff, but I think it’s enough.

A Simple Process for Un-Doing:

Spend some time journaling each day, starting by reflecting on the “distractions” in your life.

What activities or habits do you have/do to avoid being with yourself? Do you work way too much, or always help a friend or family member, which leaves you overwhelmed and busy? Do you eat and watch movies to distract yourself? Whatever it is, write it down.

Once you’ve written down your distractions, look deeper into the underlying belief behind these habits.

For example, you find that when you’re upset you eat sweets. Why do you eat sweets? To feel more full. Why do you want to feel fuller? Because I’m afraid of being alone. Why are you afraid of being alone? Because when I’m alone, I’m sad. Why are you sad? And so on… Weed out some of the underlying thoughts or beliefs behind your habits.

Notice.

You don’t have to fix, change, or improve anything. Just notice yourself when you’re engaging in these activities. Do this for one to two weeks. Bring awareness to these areas and journal about them.

After one to two weeks of noticing, if you feel inspired to do less or take action, such as stopping snacking or working fewer hours, go ahead, but it’s not required.

Add to your schedule some alone time each day doing nothing.

Sit on your couch, rest in your bed (without falling asleep), and be in nature. Add 10-30 minutes of alone time each day. If strong emotions come up, be with them; give yourself permission to feel.

The more time I spent by myself, the more I got to know who I was and what I was about. And when I learned about myself, I found I no longer needed to distract myself from the parts of myself that I didn’t like.

A Sneaky Weight Loss Secret

by Renee Heigel

Love HandleI want to share one of the best secrets to weight loss I’ve ever learned.  It’s a core shift in focus that changes everything. But before I tell you about that, let me explain what happened to a client of mine recently…

She’s in her bathroom, putting on makeup, it is taking forever. All she wants is to feel attractive. She feels exhausted, unsexy and lethargic…  None of her clothes fit and nothing looks good. Moments ago, as she took off outfit #8, she sat for a moment on her bed in anguish and pain. She’s embarrassed, but this will have to do. It’s time to go.

She turns off the light and walks down the hall and then she sees him.

She’s nervous and excited. Early morning’s to work out, drinking and eating all of these healthy things. She is trying…

Her husband is standing at the end of the hall and she is yearning for him to simply notice her. He looks at her and says, “ready to go, we’re going to be late”.  He doesn’t see her, check her out or notice her outfit.

He says nothing more and then turns his back to go grab the keys…

She was DYING to be seen, to be appreciated.  But it was like she was invisible.  (And that wasn’t even the worst part…)

I’ll tell you about the worst part in just a sec.   For now one of the most important lessons I’ve ever learned…

Here’s something you should know about me:  I do not own a scale.

And, if you are my client, then you’ll know that I’ve probably told you to throw yours away too.

As far as I’m concerned, you have no use for a scale in your house.

A lot of my clients feel incredibly anxious when I challenge them with this…

But here’s the deal:  Your scale keeps you focused on LACK.

When you use a scale you are thinking about what you don’t want.

Yes, you might imagine the day you lose those 15 pounds and you see it on the scale…

BUT…

Before you step that little toe up onto your scale, there is an unconscious fear that sucks you into a fearful vortex.

It’s screaming, “please, please, please… weigh less than or at least the same as I weighed last time.”

And then you see the result and you’re never happy.

You cannot win at this point.

Back to our story of my lovely client.

She returned home from her evening out, weighed herself immediately to see if there was difference in her weight. She gained 2 pounds. She is feeling fat, ugly and depressed. Her man didn’t noticed her and she ate like a bird all night for fear of that measurement on her scale sliding forward and she stilled gained weight!?

When her husband fell asleep, do you know what she did?

She got up in the middle of the night and pulled the tub of chocolate marshmallow ice cream out of the fridge and sat at the table and ate it all until it was gone.

It filled that empty void that she didn’t get filled up earlier, but not for long.

She tossed and turned until she fell back to sleep, feeling horrible and like she had failed yet again.

Guess what, she woke up and got on the scale once again only to see that the number had moved by a pound.

If you can only do one thing, then do this:

Make a choice to: Show up for yourself. Listen to your body and ask yourself: How do I feel right now?

It’s not about the scale.

It’s about loving yourself.

If you are stuck in a similar pattern then comment below.

With love,

Renee “no scale” Heigel

And then…I flipped off the Father of Motivation

By Nancy Levin

goldstarsticker2It was 2am on November 17, 2007…and I was determined.

I was producing two events with Wayne Dyer back-to-back over the course of a weekend. He spoke in Atlanta on Saturday afternoon, and then the whole crew of us flew to Detroit where he was to speak again on Sunday afternoon. By 10pm, we were all settled into our hotel rooms in Detroit. Then my phone rang. It was Wayne, and he was in a panic. It was his briefcase, he told me. He couldn’t find it, and he was sure he’d left it somewhere en route from Atlanta. Everything was in that briefcase, he told me. Notes and books for his lecture, notes for the next book he was writing, money, and more. He couldn’t even think about getting on stage the next day without it.

At that point in my life, I was still chasing all the gold stars. Still seeking all my validation externally, which I received primarily through my work as the Event Director at Hay House, which is where I received the most love and accolades. I aimed for perfection, and generally achieved it. This situation was no different.

I was going to figure out where that briefcase was if it killed me.

I thought back. Wayne only used his briefcase at the actual events. We’d literally left the stage in Atlanta and gotten into a van en route to the airport, so he’d had his briefcase then. I had a hunch it was still in that vehicle. I called the car company and was told that the van wouldn’t be back to the lot for another hour.

No problem, I told them. I’d wait and call back.

I called an hour later the van was back, but the news wasn’t good. The dispatcher told me he’d checked and the briefcase wasn’t there. I begged him to go back out and look again. It was dark out, I figured; maybe he’d just missed it. I sat on hold, praying it was hiding under a seat. Lo and behold, I was right! The dispatcher came back and told me he had the briefcase in hand.

It was now close to midnight. Wayne called me again, and I told him I’d located the briefcase and was working on getting it to Detroit. I told him he should go to bed and not worry. He was relieved and appreciative, but still anxious—he didn’t know how he was going to get on stage without his notes and books.

I asked the car company if they would put an employee on a plane first thing in the morning to deliver the briefcase. No suck luck; traveling with someone else’s bag had become illegal after 9/11. I called FedEx, UPS, DHL and every other carrier I could find in the phone book, but it was a weekend everyone was off the clock. I called airlines to ask about freight and cargo shipments; once again it was a no-go because it was Saturday night. I called my travel agent, Andrea, who was on California time. But even putting our heads together we couldn’t come up with a solution to get the briefcase from Atlanta to Detroit by 2pm when Wayne was supposed to walk on stage.

I had a reputation for achieving the impossible. I had set my own bar so high that even though it was the wee hours of the morning and I could see no resolution, failure was still not an option.

I had left messages for some seemingly back-alley messenger services, and tried to watch TV until they called back. But at a certain point I just couldn’t sit there doing nothing any longer. At 4am I got dressed, walked downstairs, and asked the bellman to get me a taxi.

In the back seat, on my laptop, I bought a round round-trip ticket to Atlanta. I sent emails to my staff with instructions for setting up at the venue and getting it all going with without me. We were expecting 2,000 people and I wouldn’t get there until about 30 minutes before showtime, but I couldn’t care.

Based on my experiences that day, I do believe that Detroit and Atlanta are the biggest airports in the whole world. I had to go through security, get to my departure gate in Detroit, fly, go out to Baggage Claim in Atlanta where a guy from the car company was waiting for me, retrieve the briefcase, go back through security—where they questioned and groped me because I had only just arrived in Atlanta minutes before and was only traveling with a briefcase—get to my departure gate, fly again, get out of the Detroit airport, get into a taxi and get to the event venue.

Sitting in my seat, on the runway on my way back to Detroit, I called Wayne.

“Hi. I’ve got your briefcase.”

“Where are you?”

“That’s not important.”

“You’re not in Detroit, are you?”

“You’ll have your briefcase before you go on stage.”

“Nancy, did you do something crazy?’

“Wayne, just go to your Bikram Yoga class and I’ll see you soon.”

We have a little ritual when I introduce Wayne on stage. The last thing I say is, “I know he needs no introduction, but please welcome to the stage one of my most favorite men in the world—Wayne Dyer.” He comes on, the crowd goes wild, he gives me a hug, and I whisper “Have fun!” in his ear. But that day he held onto me so I couldn’t walk offstage. He turned and told the audience the whole story. How I had gone above and beyond the call of duty, stayed up all night, flown to Atlanta and back to retrieve the briefcase he left there. He explained that there was nothing I wouldn’t do, at any cost, to make whatever needed to happen happen. He even shared what had happened a few minutes earlier, when I had returned the briefcase to him.

I had gotten to the venue just a few minutes before Wayne’s car pulled up. As he stepped out of the car, with throngs of fans surrounding us, I smiled and extended my arm with briefcase in hand. Jokingly, he put up his hand as if to dismiss the offer. “Oh, I don’t need that!” he said.

And then, without missing a beat, in front of all those people, I flipped off the father of motivation.

And now, 6 years later, I have reconciled with resolving internally what I had been seeking externally. I am beginning to believe that I am loved for who I am, not for what I do. And I have finally stopped chasing all the gold stars since I know that no amount will ever be enough. While, most importantly during this process, I have discovered that I am.

I’d love to hear from you…please share your story of chasing gold stars and/or knowing that you are enough!

xoxo
Nancy

Follow Your Intuition…It Knows the Way

By Joan Herrmann

1383332_93148085Throughout the last four years, my professional life has taken many twists and turns. There are times that I operate by the seat of my pants learning as I go along, praying for the best possible outcome, following my intuition and my heart.

Recently I began to work with a person that was assigned to my company’s account. From the moment I met him, my entire body screamed, “be careful!” There was something about him that told me not to be too trusting. All the warning signs were there – my intuition was on the job.

Now I’m the type of person who wants to trust everyone and I usually give people the benefit of the doubt many, many, many times. I want to believe that others have the same agenda and motives so I push my inner guidance aside.

This person dangled golden opportunities in front of me; he offered me more than I could have imagined – everything I wanted. It would be easy for me to get caught up in his promises. But there was always that nagging feeling inside of me.  Something didn’t add up. There was never a straight answer to my questions, always a tap dance.

After our first meeting, I couldn’t sleep for a few nights. Even though I was excited about what was to come, I felt sick every time I recounted the possible opportunities to my friends. My body tightened and sometimes I actually shook. My nerves were on end.

But because he was answering my prayers (or so I thought at the time), I pushed the warning signs aside and worked with him. I took what he said and turned it into what I wanted to hear, what I wanted him to say.  But there was always that nagging feeling inside of me.

As time passed, he began to request more and more from my company in return for the promised opportunities, which by the way, never materialized. I finally decided to listen to my inner guidance, which was SCREAMING by this time, and I called him out. Once I stopped taking what he said at face value and held my ground, all the promises immediately disappeared. He showed his true colors.

It took months of anxious moments and many sleepless nights before I found the courage to follow, what I knew from the beginning, to be the right direction. I knew all along what was right for me; I just chose not to listen. Thankfully I found the courage.

Does this story sound familiar? How many times do you make something fit the way you want it to while all the time knowing it’s wrong for you?

We all want to believe in others and try to please others, but at what cost? How long can you stay in a dying relationship or in a job that’s making you sick? How many times can you keep saying “yes” while inside you’re screaming “no”?

We all have inner guidance to point us in the right direction. The problem is, more often than not, we don’t listen. It’s not always easy to stand up for what we want – sometimes it seems impossible – but it’s always worth it. The moment I stood up for myself I began to sleep better and feel more relaxed – I could breathe. While I may not have gotten what I wanted at this time, I know something better will come.

Learn to trust yourself. Follow your intuition – it knows the way. You are stronger than you think and wiser than you know.

Why Do We Need to Forgive?

Excerpt: “How to Speak Unity” -Temple Hayes-
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Resentment gets re-sent and re-sent in our lives. When we hold discord in our bodies towards someone else, we are affected spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically. Often, the lack of forgiveness contributes to the lack of abundance and creativity in our lives. Forgiveness is the opportunity FOR GIVING to ourselves in a much greater way, versus holding anger and energy that takes away from our good.

Forgiveness in not a special event which happens every now and then. It is a way of living life every day. We end the day with a prayer of forgiveness for any moment in that day in which we showed any behavior which was less than the expression of our Christ consciousness. When we forgive others, we remove the blocks of resentment and allow more good to flow into our lives. When we forgive ourselves, we take responsibility for our actions and step further into our spiritual magnificence.
For more inspiration and information: http://templehayes.org/

Give Yourself Permission

By Lisa Selow

Permission slip for blog postWhen going through conscious type of life changes, sometimes our inner child feels like it needs approval from others. Even though I’m a rebel, preferring my inner authority instead of outside sources, I’m human.

It’s human to feel like you need approval, permission, or to get others’ opinions from time to time.

The challenge in waiting to get others’ approval is to not allow it to hold you back. I can get stuck in analysis, causing procrastination. If you’re sensitive (like me), sometimes, others’ words or even lack thereof, can make you start to question yourself. (By the way, I’m not saying to ignore others’ opinions, especially if you have a partner, children, loved ones, or others who will be affected by your choices. Of course, please consult them for at least the big stuff.)

I find that if I get a great idea or that I feel guided to make a change in my life often it feels right and I don’t need any opinions. Let’s say I want to change the color in my living room. I’m really drawn to coral and oranges lately with teal accents. I’m going to go for it soon. (Are you reading this, hubby? I need your painting skills!).

Some changes feel a bit more scary though. For example, I’ve had Bettie Page bangs since 2005. I’ve changed up my hair color often, but not my cut. For the past year, I’ve been agonizing about whether to let my bangs grow out. I mean, it’s just hair, right? I can cut it again, if I don’t like how the bangs turn out. I also have a stellar hairdresser whom I trust.

Other changes really scare me! Things like moving cross-country or doing my yoga teacher training. (I’m going to do the latter next year, if all goes well.) I know that some fears serve us. I don’t like the idea of jumping out of an airplane, but that is a good thing. It makes me go take a class, not that I ever would. I also have a healthy fear of going trekking in the Himalayas, but I know that I will one day. Of course, I will train for it and research the best guided trip for me, maybe doing some high altitude living for a spell to get acclimated.

I imagine that most of our first world changes that we desire to make or challenges we face pale in comparison to decisions having to be made in places that have war, natural disasters, government upheavals, revolution, poverty, and other distress. I do my best to imagine this, putting my little, old problems into perspective when I am trying to make decisions.

I’m not trying to guilt you with the prior paragraph about first world pain, and well, if you’re human, you’ve probably already mastered how to guilt trip yourself in the past. When I feel like I need approval or the green light, I see it as a chance to gently re-parent my inner child who feels lost. Then, I go into my inner adult or parent and mentally write myself a permission slip. I say you can even go one step further and make a physical permission slip, signing your name, something like the below:

“I, Lisa Selow, give myself full out permission to change the style of my hair, the colors of my website and the rooms in my house.” [date and sign]

Yes, it’s a mundane example, but hey, once you get used to giving yourself permission, it will get easier. I’ve found that this practice helps me to feel peaceful about my decision. I don’t worry as much about making the “right” decision. I only can make the best decision I can in the moment for where I’m currently at in life.

What about you? What do you need to write a permission slip for in your own life? Share in the comments below and let’s support each other.

Live what you love

By Barbara Carrellas

energyscaleHave you ever had the experience of meeting someone and feeling instantly drawn to them? Every moment you spend in their presence is captivating and exciting—it’s almost like being in love. When you part company you feel positively high and the effect may last for days. Conversely, have you ever met someone and felt the urge to back up or get away? Each minute spent with them feels like an hour. When you finally do get away you feel exhausted, drained or frazzled. It’s obvious which of these people you’d pick if you wanted to start an ecstatic relationship, right?

How about your work? Which projects make you feel giddy with accomplishment and delight? Which fill you with dread? How about your social life? Which activities and events feel fresh, new and energizing? Which have become more of a habit than a pleasure?

The secret to living a more ecstatic life is no secret at all:  Do as much of what you love as you possibly can. Do as little as you must of anything you don’t like. Seek maximum exposure to people, places, and things that energize you, and minimal exposure to people, places, and things that drain your energy.

Obvious as this is, it’s not always easy to put into practice. Ask yourself:

  • What is stopping me from breaking a habit or ending a relationship that feels like more of an energy drain than an energy gain?
  • Am I worried about hurting someone’s feelings?  Or losing my job? Am I afraid to take a leap into the unknown? What do I believe will happen if I do?
  • In which area of my life could I most easily take a step that would create an energy gain? (For example, could I keep a promise to myself to attend a yoga, Pilates, or dance class at least once a week?)
  • In what area of my life could I stop or slow an energy drain? (Could I limit phone calls with my well-meaning but critical mother to once a week for thirty minutes?)

Learn to pay attention to your intuitive energy meter. Imagine that you have two dials in your body that control the way you take in information and make decisions—one in your brain and another in your belly. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and turn down the dial in your brain. Take another big breath and turn up the dial in your belly. Ask yourself: Do I feel an energy gain or an energy drain in this situation, or around this person? This simple exercise will help you move out of judgements and into your intuition.

Some of the most powerful energy gains or drains we experience are caused by the thoughts we think. Ask yourself, “On a scale of one (drain) to ten (gain), is the thought I am thinking right now an energy gain or an energy drain?” In the next week, stop several times to observe the quality of your thoughts. Practice elevating the energy level of your thoughts. Think thoughts that feed you.

Handle nagging physical problems. Do you have a persistent physical issue that you have been meaning to deal with but just haven’t gotten around to yet? The physical problem you’re avoiding is draining energy that you could be using for ecstatic expression. Whether it’s poor eyesight, back pain, sexual pain, or any other chronic condition, practice self-love and self-care by getting help.

Avoid social obligations—pursue social opportunities. The rare social obligation—even if it’s deadly dull—will not prevent you from living an ecstatic life. But if you allow yourself to be lured into too many of these so-called obligatory functions, you’ll find yourself being drained of the time and energy you would otherwise have to devote to more meaningful interactions. Look for social opportunities. They can be found anywhere and anytime you have a high probability of meeting delightful people who share one or more of your passions. It could be an erotic massage workshop, an evening of trance dancing, a gourmet dessert-baking evening, or a birthday celebration at a spa. Try and arrange at least two social opportunities for every social obligation. If you need inspiration and assistance finding opportunities, search the Internet for meet-up groups in your area.

Expand your sexuality. It can be your greatest source of energy and ecstatic experience. Whether or not you have a partner, commit to being more sensual and sexual. Try something new—a new position, or toy, or activity. Re-examine your sexual boundaries with the intention of seeing if you’d like to relax some of them. Think of sex as adult play, and set up a play date.

When you focus on maximizing energy gains and diminishing energy drains, you’ll soon find more joy and ecstasy in every area of your life.

Wedding Looks

By Megan Alice Arterberry

I got a question about what to wear to a wedding. In fact, she has three weddings to attend! One is at the beach, another at a vineyard, and a formal affair over the summer and into fall. While choosing pieces, I had in mind the longevity of each piece for her wardrobe. I have learned over the years, through trial and error, the value of price-per-wear. Here are my wedding looks :

Beach and Vineyard Wedding: One Look for Both Weddings! (Luckily they don’t have the same guests!)

Formal Wedding: 

  • The lace dress is great for formal events.
  • The nude patent pumps are low and designed for comfort, and Kate Middleton has proven that nude patent pumps go with everything formal – even Camilla’s on board!
  • The use of the same clutch and jewelry prove how good these pieces are!

I also found two more looks that might work for all three weddings!

  • The coral shades of the pink dress and orange wrap are perfect for the transition of summer to fall.
  • The pearl bracelet gives a beachy yet classic feel.
  • The low sandals give comfort and has both quality and value, in which J.Crew is prized for.
  • The same clutch and earrings!

or…

  • The deep purple dress, both flowy and formal, compliments the lilac wrap.
  • The same great sandals but in silver to work better with the purple hues.
  • My favorite clutch and jewelry finish the look off nicely!

Plus, here are a few tips:

  • Go to Nordstrom for undergarments – they measure for proper fitting
  • A short nail with pale pink polish – simple, clean, and pretty
  • Mineral Makeup – great for your skin
  • Hair in a low chignon or a slicked low ponytail with a side part – great for wind
  • Natural perfume – easy on the nose for sensitive guests (jasmine is my favorite scent for summer)

Don’t put me in that hole with that pigeon.

By Kate Northrup

MoneyALoveStoryCover

I have a confession to make:

I’ve got this book about money coming out and I’m scared of being “the money girl” for the rest of my life.

My book is called Money: A Love Story, Untangle Your Financial Woes and Create the Life You Really Want. As my publication date gets closer (September 10, 2013), I find myself getting my panties in a wrinkle worrying about what this book is going to mean to my life twenty years from now.

I have at least one other book about money in me. But I also have ideas flowing about spirituality, health, parenting (someday), and relationships.

I’ve paused many times along this book launch process wondering if I’m going to have to move into talking 401K’s and IRA’s in order to stay on point with my brand. (If I did I would feel terminally bored. I’ll leave the nuts and bolts and abbreviations to financial planners and such.)

Ever hesitate to start something because you don’t want to be “branded” by that thing for the rest of your life?

When I get über stuck in my head about it, I think about other people I admire who’ve changed direction with agility and style.

Marie Forleo’s first book was called Make Every Man Want You. Now she teaches women how to rock businesses online.

Chris Guillebeau started out in service work on the Mercy Ships. Now he teaches how to live an unconventional life.

Ronald Reagan was an actor who went on to become President.

Gretchen Rubin was a lawyer who now writes about happiness.

Joy Behar was a high school English teacher before she started doing stand-up in her forties.

Louise Hay was a model and didn’t start Hay House Publishing until she was in her sixties.

My dad was an orthopedic surgeon who’s now a full-time, stay-at-home dad to my eleven-year-old sister.

All of these folks gave themselves permission to morph into the next great version of themselves. There was probably some angst and a bit of an identity crisis or two along the way. But they’re shining examples of the truth that it’s okay to change careers, change topics, and even to change your mind.

A reminder to myself and anyone else who needs it:

If you own and accept who you are, even if it’s a different version than yesterday, other people will accept you too.

We never really know where we’re going. Life is deliciously surprising. Chances are pretty good that all of us will change direction in a major way at some point in our lives.

So, instead of worrying about being “the money girl” forever and cringing every time someone tells me that I’m going to be “the next Suze Orman,” I’ve decided to just do the work.

Right now I’ve got something to tell people about money. Right now I’ve got some insight to share in this particular playground.

At some point in the future I may have something to share in some other playground.

But for now I’m choosing to let go of the fear of future limitation in honor of playing full out right now . . .

Have you ever not started a project because you were afraid of being limited by it later on in life? Do you ever find yourself getting nervous about being pigeon-holed by your brand? Have you made a major change in your career? How did it feel? How did you navigate it? Leave a comment — I’d love to hear your wisdom on this one!

Photo: Henning Mühlinghaus

 

What Motivates Visionaries To “Dominate” The World?

By Lissa Rankin

te108-361835d9-ab5f-4437-8c80-65a1ecfdbcad-v2I’m writing this on a plane from Portland back home to San Francisco after joining 3000 visionaries and thought leaders who attended Chris Guillebeau’s World Domination Summit. This very inspiring conference was peopled with those inspired by Chris’s manifesto “A Brief Guide To World Domination,” which is less about colonization and more about saving the world.

Gretchen Rubin is saving the world by teaching people how to be happier, Don Miller is helping people rewrite the stories of their lives, Nancy Duarte is helping people tell stories that can change the world, Bob Moore is changing the world by putting people before profit, Jia Jiang is changing the world by helping people learn to take risks by getting comfortable with rejection.

Pretty much everyone I met was either on a mission to fulfill a calling or on a quest to find one. After the conference ended with a tear-jerking sparkling apple juice toast, I found myself reinvigorated in my own mission to heal health care, and everyone I spoke to felt inspired to change the world in their own small or big way.

It was awesome.

But as the afterglow of the post-WDS Bollywood dance party wore off, I found myself pondering what motivated all of us to try to make the world a better place.

I wound up posting this on Facebook:

After spending the weekend with 3000 visionaries committed to changing the world, I find myself reflecting upon on what motivates visionaries. Are we motivated by a pure, unadulterated desire to leave the world better off than we found it? Or are we operating from a place of deep unworthiness, of not being enough unless we make the world a better place? Or is it some combination of both?

So many people are desperate to find their calling, their reason for existence, their meaning of life. And many others, like myself, feel they have found it- and are now on a quest to fulfill a vision. But is the quest driven by the right motives?

What made Martin Luther King, Jr campaign for civil rights? What made Nelson Mandela take a stand? What made Abraham Lincoln free the slaves? What made Evita and Mother Teresa fight for the rights of the poor?

Is it a deep-seated sense of unworthiness that needs to be healed? Is it ego? Do we need to feel like we’ve contributed big things so we know we are valuable? Is it karmic? Are we trying to pay off some debt for wrongs committed in past lives? Are we craving love, acceptance, external validation?

Or is it noble? Are we just caring, committed souls devoted to service without any self-serving motives? Are we clear vessels for Divine work in the world moving through us?

What do YOU think?

The Facebook Response

Forty-seven people responded with very thoughtful answers, including these:

Beth Gradone Krajewski wrote, “I suspect human beings come from mixed motives much of the time, and we can afford to be forgiving of the ego-ridden places in ourselves and others if the work is really being done and done well. But motives do matter, at least as far as they can poison the work if not recognized and dealt with. Lifting up the questions and asking all those who engage in visionary action to get real about their self-worth and the source of their dreams only furthers the work itself and the quality of the results.”

Jennifer Newcomb Marine wrote, “I think the vision, altruism and drive spring from someplace pure in your heart. Then fear and ego get involved and create this start-stop dance of self-doubt, craving validation, and thinking, ‘To heck with everyone!’and so on… The trick is to get out of your own way so you can make a contribution. But the journey there is full of learning about how and why you trip yourself up too.”

Pamela Potter wrote, “I really think it is a divine push that we can’t avoid. Many of the historical figures weren’t what we’d consider personally enlightened and many of them didn’t get any kind of recognition until much later, so I don’t think ego figures in. If you are called to do something, you just CAN’T not do it. Even if you just babble at people and write a blog that no one reads or articles that don’t always get published, your heart has to know that you are doing something. I’m not sure most of us go into it with a plan. We just can’t stop thinking about our thing, what ever it is, and we have to DO something.”

Lori Santo posted, “I personally feel that it is a powerful inner pull….. combined with a ‘Priestly Divine Appointment’ ~ which of course transcends language ~ coupled with an intense sense of and alignment with profound compassion for humanity.”

The Evolution Of The Species

I don’t know the answer to the questions I pose. But I have a hunch that our species is evolving, maybe not so much on the physical plane, but at the level of consciousness.  For many years, many of us- myself included- have been spiritually asleep.  But more and more people are waking up to a broadening consciousness, and this awakening is accompanied by a desire to leave the world better than we found it.

Uri Geller once suggested that we only use 10% of the capacity of our brains, and while PET scan imagery and fMRI seem to refute this, I do suspect we have capacities of consciousness we are only just beginning to tap into.  Neurosurgeon Eben Alexander, author of Proof Of Heaven, wrote about how his near-death experience, which occurred while he was technically brain dead, changes his belief that consciousness lies in the brain. He now believes that consciousness transcends the brain, that we have souls that exist beyond the body, and that there are realms of consciousness a few lucky ducks like Dr. Alexander and Anita Moorjani have been blessed to experience and then remember.

Stealth Agents For God

World Domination Summit has nothing to do with religion, Chris Guillebeau certainly wouldn’t self-identify as a spiritual leader, and many of those who attended probably wouldn’t even label themselves as spiritual, but I left World Domination Summit with a strong sense that the Divine is at work though the vehicle of the people who attended this conference.

Martha Beck would call these people “The Team” or “Stealth Agents For God”. We are all doing our part, in our own Divinely unique way, to make the world a better place.

So I guess it doesn’t really matter what motivates those of us to “dominate” the world. The important thing is that we are making ourselves vessels, allowing Divine work to move through us, spreading love and kindness and compassion and grace, leaving the world better than we found it.

What Do YOU Think?

Tell us your stories.

With love and world domination,